Talking to your child about bullying can be difficult. However, the difficult conversations are often the most important ones to have. Your child needs to know about bullying from an early age so they know what to do if it happens to them. Talking about it early on can also help you avoid a situation where your child becomes the bully. Here are a few recommendations we have for talking to your child about this tough subject.
Start Broad
If you dive right into different types of bullying and how bullying may impact your child, you may end up scaring them more than helping. Start the conversation by bringing up bullying and asking what they know. Talk about different types of bullying, like cyberbullying and in-person bullying. Ask questions. See what they think, and see if there’s anything you can teach them before going into a deeper conversation.
Listen to Your Child
Being bullied often makes children feel ashamed. There’s a strong chance that if your child is being bullied in school or online, they won’t tell you until the situation escalates. That’s one reason why it’s important to listen to your child intently when they tell you how they’re doing. Check up on them often to make sure they’re in a good place. If you notice signs of bullying, like withdrawing, sleeping less or constantly looking stressed, ask what’s going on. Letting your child know you’re there for them when they need you can make a big difference in their lives.
If They’re Being Bullied
When your child reveals to you that they’ve been bullied, a rush of thoughts may flood into your mind. However, you need to remain calm. Remember, your child has entrusted you with information that they may have been holding onto for a while. First, you need to reassure your child that this is not their fault. Children and adults are often shamed into feeling guilty for others’ bad behavior.
Ask for more details about the situation. Has this happened before? Do you feel unsafe? While you may be tempted to call the school immediately, you’ll want to ask your child first. If you talk to the school, they may have to as well, and they need to be ready for that. Finally, work on solutions with your child. See what your child can do to avoid these situations with the bully, and come up with an action plan for what to do if it happens again.
If They Bully Others
The last thing you want to learn is that your child has bullied another child. As difficult as it may be, you need to approach the situation with an open mind. See if you can figure out the reasons why they decided to bully other children, and help them come up with better solutions for dealing with difficult feelings or situations. If you spend time processing this with your child and the bullying continues, consider sending your child to therapy. Your child may benefit from talking to a third party who is trained in areas like cognitive behavioral therapy.
Look into School Programs
Some schools, like NTCA, have bullying prevention programs to address bullying that takes place on campus. If your child’s school has a bullying prevention program, they may have resources available for parents and children to help them deal with these situations.
Bullying is a serious issue, especially when families don’t talk about it. At North Tampa Christian Academy, a Tampa private school, we have a Bullying Prevention Program to address bullying from all sides. Our school allows students to thrive creatively, academically and spiritually in a project-based learning environment. Faculty and families work together to inspire leadership through Christian innovation. Contact us today to learn more.